"Please eat slowly,"

Once or twice a week, me and my friends of fifteen years would get together over dinner, after cocktails, movie night or coffee. We’d dine over chicken biryani, papad and chicken barbecue mostly and add a few dishes to share and after that, play a few board games, billiards and the rest would curl up in a corner and smoke mint or apple-flavored shisha.

One particular night, I was tired from work and I sat there in the middle of one of our dinners, contented, listening to my friends’ stories about the travels they made, and how we were getting older and just gossiped about anything. I didn’t realize I was taking my time slicing my food in tiny pieces and chewing them carefully when I noticed everybody wiped their plates clean. I poked my baby potato and pushed it around the plate when I heard myself say a little bit loud, “Please eat slowly,” I looked up and everybody stared at me sympathetically. I gave an apologetic look pretending I was finished with dinner. But my friend Ayeesha loaded up my plate with some more biryani and everybody help themselves to a third serving of everything! They squeezed my hand and sliced their food in very small pieces then ate in slow motion. I laughed heartily and enjoyed every forkful of my food. Ryan saw me looking at a piece of chicken but I have decided not to eat it since I didn’t have the strength to slice through it. He smiled at me, took the chicken out of the basket and peeled it thinly onto my plate. Missy sourced out a straw for my glass, so I won’t have to tip the glass when I drank.

Like true friends, they knew what I was going through, them being in the medical field was an added bonus. I appreciate them even more for being understanding and patient for the ordeal I was going through. My friends have adjusted to this difficult situation of mine as my family have. They’ve learned that my condition is worsening every week, and it was a matter of time before I get bedridden and be so motionless. I told them that Thymectomy might put me in complete remission should I proceed with the operation, I expressed my frustrations and how scared I was. They listened about the things I have thoroughly researched on, and they nodded as-a-matter-of-factly. Explaining it to a group of people from the medical field was easy as explaining alphabet to a high school student. They support me on this journey and said that it would help me a great deal. If all goes well, and the operation is successful, we’d do what I love doing – food tripping, and makeup shopping!

I have amazing friends who were always there in my victories and defeat. They never left even during times I wanted to give up on everything, even myself. It will take more than rhyme and reason to figure out what friendship really means to a lot of people. It’s not the good times that true friends are measured by, it’s the bad and the ugly episodes that friends embrace the truth about each other.

that frickin' wake-up call!

I push myself to stress and unrest to a fault. I hate that my weekends would go to waste after the work week. After the picnic with my team,we ended everything by 1pm. Flashback 9am, Mama said to skip the picnic and get enough rest since I only had two hours of sleep. Secretly, I haven't told her that I had few stolen hours of sleep the night before and I've been double-dosing on my medication which is a no-no.

That afternoon, I was organizing events and that's when the weariness and my myasthenics had kicked in lightly, I set it aside and went on with my activities til 10pm. My brother came home that night watching TV on the other room, I made a beeline to the hallway and when I got back, my feet were glued to the floor! Like some heavy thing weighed it down. One more step, I knew I was gonna fall. I held tight to the hardwood dresser in front of me, and heat was creeping up my neck, my vision blurred almost instantly, I called my brother to get me a chair really quick,but just as he thought it was quick enough, BANG! My chin then my head hit the hardwood following a fall on my back. My brother dragged me to the side of the bed, worried, he was trying to lift me, but I told him we'd wait a few minutes before I could regain strength. And true enough, throwing caution to the wind, I pushed myself up the bed, with my brother pushing the rest of my weight in.

5am and I am widely awake, I heard water from the backyard, so I got up and switched it off, as I made my way to the front door, the most unfortunate thing happened again, my knees were weak and felt like Jell-O. Thankfully, my brother just woke up and wondered why there were lights turned on in the living room. He saw my worried look and ran to me, offering his back for a piggy back ride and slid me gently to the couch.

I guess..i have to give in to the doctor's specific requests, my body hates me now more than ever. I promise myself things will get better, and I'll start by NOT being stubborn.

my Princess Hours

As I fluorished the last piece of Almond Roca that my sister Tea gave me that morning, I took the laptop by my window and checked to see what my friends have been up to for the past few days. My heart flutters for the people who starts to leave the country and start back at zero to a new place. Amazing, isn't it? There's fear and excitement at the same time. The kind of adrenaline rush some are just too afraid to try. I always wonder if life is passing me by so quickly. At the rate things are going, I might be the only one just taking my own sweet time at things. The opportunities just go like running water and I keep missing it everytime. Sometimes, I feel like I'm a freshly-picked grape sitting and waiting to be an age-old prune still hoping to be churned into a classic, expensive wine that everybody celebrates on. I read at one article that "opportunities only come once, so whatever feeling you have, set it aside and just show up," this one just knocked me over.

Being a creature of habit is really hard, getting out of my comfort zone is even harder. But I need to constantly remind myself that I can't live a charmed life all the time when I need to thread the hard experiences to be strong like the rest of my friends and people that I know. That's one of the reasons why I'm as fragile as glass and I could break any day now. I need to experience life outside of what I was used to. And that "used-to" place is not here, it's out there somewhere.
Eventually, I'll get tired of the people who give in to my whims, do what I asked them and like what I love, because I miss the girl who doesn't sit in one place too long. I'm just waiting for my adventure to start, with or without someone. Someday, I will ask myself if I'm ready to take a chance to start my life and take on the world again. For now, that will have to wait and still wear my pink crown, up here on a high horse...

subtle Saturday

SATURDAY MORNING greeted us happily as we exited the doors of the office. The smell of smoked sausages fanned through the air and we wondered where it came from. A few meters from where I was standing was the longest sausage links that stretch from the Convention Center to as far as my eyes could see. Guarding the links were students from a neighboring university wearing chef uniforms and toques. Last week was the biggest pizza the city could make, this time the longest sausage link in the history of Baguio. It made our mouths water. What gives? It's the city's Centennial,so they're celebrating it in any way possible.The night before, our boss invited us for her party in Green Valley for that morning. One of our friends, Joyce brought her van to bring us there and the first time I saw the van, it looked so old I was just waiting for it to collapse in pieces with the wheels rolling to the streets something out of a funny car commercial. We were halfway there when the van acted out and broke down somewhere in a place we weren't familiar with and where taxis are hardly passing by. We were all pissed because not only did our boss not pick us (her guests) up, we walked up a hill, lost and so hungry. My legs were shaking from too much walking and then, just when we thought a mirage appeared, a real taxi answered our prayers!
We were only too happy to be squished like tomatoes inside the cab and the driver snorted but his mood did not put our happy moods down. So I remembered that it was my cheat day today, so I had to choose what food to reward myself with. Grilled? Baked? or.. I know! I let the taxi drop me off at Central Park, the chinese restaurant that nestled sweetly in Legarda road, far away from the busy streets of the Longganisa Festival. A waiter greeted me warmly and had me seated at one of the big tables. I ordered a regular iced soda, and lechon macau rice topping, then just when I was dreaming of the calorie fest I was going to have, a dimsum cart wheezed its way to my direction. Piles of little bamboo steamers boast itself of pretty,mouthwatering steamed meats! I wanted the japanese siomai bamboo steamer(ground pork meat with onions, water chestnuts, turnips wrapped in nori) but I settled for the house specialty Central Park siomai which consists of the same japanese siomai but with ham and oodles of sweet jellyfish wrapped around the meat. It tasted heavenly when dipped in chili oil, soy sauce and calamansi! A few minutes later my order arrived in large serving, the crispy crown roast pork piled in a beautiful plate with pickled papaya and rice and liver dip on the side. I devoured it slowly and chewed it enjoyably as the crunch and flavors exploded in my mouth wishing that this happy feeling stays with me for the rest of the day. The fat, delectably delicious, had been too much, so I shoved the rest of it aside as I sipped the remaining soda in my glass and sighed. My eyes were a little tired from last night's work but my mood that was nearly spoiled by a funny, unfortunate event did not hinder me from enjoying a sinful cheat day. As I cap the meal, I was craving for ice cream from Jollibee. I hailed a cab and requested him to pass by the drive-thru for just one order- Ube Cheesy Magic (crushed ice with milk and sweet yam sprinkled with cheese), it was delightful to just eat a spoonful at a time during traffic on the way home.
Saturday is an easy day to lose moods only to get lifted up by simple pleasures such as these. Have a great weekend.

what simple things bring..

PEOPLE WHO KNOW me know that I’m always in for cheap thrills. I am never one for expensive stuff and feel comfortable about it for a long time. Gadgets for one, don’t appeal to me as make-up do. Well, of course make-up and a few other things like facial cream, soaps and massage oils need a bang-in-the-buck to truly pamper the skin which goes a long, long way. Physical investment, I would call it.
Anyway, I had a few expensive things that went pfft on me, like my phone which I had spent so much, only to realize that I couldn’t send and receive messages after the memory card acted out on the software. Two weeks in the service center and a few thousand pesos later, my phone’s memory was freshly showered and I had no interest whatsoever in keeping it anymore since all the sentimental value of its pictures, videos and messages from friends had no trace of kilo, mega or gigabyte on it. So I rebelled and got myself the most low-end phone I could ever find, the one with yellow light on it? Yeah, that one. And then when I started to love it, it found its way to someone who needs it most a.k.a. stolen.
Tomorrow, I will shop for my phone that Ive been crushing on since the day I saw it. And I will be reconnected to all my friends again without logging on the net, I hate that I spend so much time virtually other than get in touch with people, seeing them smile, hearing them laugh and get a warm hug.

Here are my 30 cheap thrills that I love to share with you

1. hugging,kissing my baby nephew Theo
2. looking forward to everyday that I will see my baby in Bahrain by next year
3. tweeting and catching up with tweets
4. buying an affordable Nokia 7210 Supernova
5. my Harry Potter collection books, Friends
6. a sturdy glass bookcase with all my favorite authors, magazines, DVD collection, books and a real photo album of family events
7. sweet and thoughtful messages on my phone
8. mama’s warm hands
9. an occasional regular iced soda
10. looking at the mirror and amazed at how beautiful I can be despite of being tired, stressed and sad
11. lightly salted French fries and hot caramel sundae from McDonalds
12. listening to 60s music with a good book to read on a Sunday mornings
13. cooking and hosting dinners
14. digital scrapbooking
15. chicken turbo Tuesday nights with my brother W
16.f amily get-togethers over funny videos and midnight snacks
17.Pares with J and friends
18. sweets, definitely
19. someone saying “I love you” to me for no particular reason
20. Cadburry chocolates!
21. people who don’t know me personally get to know me through my blogs and Twitter
22. reading the Lucy Torres-Gomez articles every Sunday
23. losing pounds without lifting a finger (and yes that happens to me luckily)
24. the liberating feeling that you could talk to someone you used to love and not bother making him a part of your daily routine
25. my very own book launch someday
26. the pure, innocent smile of a child
27. the tranquil, peaceful solace of a beach
28. a kiss that makes me melt like butter on a hot toast
29. people saying that they are enjoying their lives just as it should be
30. family..

waving the Travellers' Flag..

LATELY, I GET FASCINATED WITH THE WORLD. The cultures, food and even the smallest trivia I could come across if it’s a different country. In my line of work, I talk to Americans every second for 11 hours straight in a day. Then when I get home, I talk to my special someone who’s from the Middle East, although he talks in broken English, it made me realize that our conversations need special care specially how I say it and when. Arabs, in my understanding are like Americans, always straight to the point, never sugarcoating whatever needs to be said. Sometimes, I get hurt with the things he say if I’m at fault. But I learned that I’m too sensitive. With the way I was taught, I always mind people’s feelings; it has rubbed off to my being with him. Whenever we would chat, I’d always correct him with how words are spelled.
I had a hard time understanding him if the phrases involve a lot of difficult words to correct. The other day, he said “I have a lixes,” and when he suddenly said “Car”, then I understood that it was a “Lexus” that he was referring to. What I like about him was he’ll admit when he is wrong and he’ll even say “Can you please correct me?” We always talk about the Gulf Coast and how I would love the food, beautiful people and the places of the Oil Country. I’d love to explore it with him, that’s what beauty of travels are for, a companion appreciating the sights and sounds through your eyes.
I have a dream of traveling to Vietnam. My dad grew up there and I want to visit the place he had so lovingly called home during his teenage years. If I have the luxury of time, I would love to get lost in Hanoi riding my bike in the lazy afternoon and eating rice papers with chicken in coconut milk or roast pork accompanied with lemon and dipped slightly in rock salt as the Vietnamese would.
A said that Egypt is beautiful and he would love to travel with me there for the second time trekking the pyramids in Giza.
What’s a party without a Mardi Gras in Rio? My wild side needs unleashing at a rave like this but that is just a thought bubble
And what would my life be without Viva Espana? Beaches in Mallorca and chasing bulls in Barcelona are the places I would love to visit, the food boasting of its rich history, and cute matadors. I would love to dress up, a red rose in my tightly bun hair dancing the flamenco with the Senoritas.
Finally, Coron,Palawan, my dream destination, the underground river, the hidden lakes, batcaves and beautiful, warm people. The journey would not be complete if not to explore it in your home country. With this, my destination will come full circle..

where was Peter Pan?

AT THIRTY, you would think I'd be married, settled and fulfilled with family life. Like most of my friends my age, they are nearly sending off their kids to kindergarten or gradeschool. Mine was sidetracked or at least I thought so.
Flashback, thirteen years ago when my dreams were still made of bubblegum,sephoras and college parties, all I wanted was to get married with my first boyfriend, but things happened along the way and growing up from the pain was necessary. I was forced to deal with what I had and let go of the future plans that I dreamed of sweetly for two plus years.
The second was dealing with my siblings to work far from home. Where we were all close knit,this had proven somewhat hard for all of us. One by one, I found myself watching TV in a big living room with only a pizza box and cried watching a happy Oprah giving awaythings for Thanksgiving.
And then it was my turn to brave Manila on my own,it was scary to find a job, struggling with things that other co-workers are struggling with. The comfort of knowing that there are people who are just like me, finding myself in this big world. Eventually, I made friends, coffee dates, pep talks, team meetings, outings, promotion, falling in love, falling out of, getting busy and sooner or later, I found myself really really growing up and accepting all the things good and bad in my life. The change looked good on me and my outlook in life. I wasn't stuck in one place anymore, all because I have accepted that I'm not a child and I had chosen to spread my wings.
Beyond the norms of having a family at this day and age, single women like me, are frowned upon because they thought we were just having too much time and this part right here, is thought to be a childish thing. But I chose to grow this way, love and family will come eventually and I'm not worried one slight bit about it. I'm not going to refuse to grow old and have laugh lines or worry that my face will turn into a wrinkled bread. Because those beautiful lines represent a history of what I have been, the struggles, pains and victories I have lovingly welcome in my life. Peter Pan can just go back to Neverland without me...

scatter-brained.

MY MIND IS RUNNING ALL OVER THE PLACE TODAY. Of all the days that I had to wake up with worry, it had to be Monday! I still couldn’t get over it. I dreamed that I was so big and I had to fit into a size 4 dress in a week for my best friend’s wedding. It can be a shallow of a dream, but it felt so excruciatingly depressing several hours after I woke up. I’m just so pressed with a November 30 wedding date on top of my head. I’ve been writing in dawdles all over my organizer. And I’m so upset with myself that I have cancelled out appointments because I lagged too much. Silly me.
Secondly, I was talking to my mom and she wanted me to go to Canada to work when my heart is set on Bahrain. She personally didn’t like Gulf countries, W was offered a job in Saudi and Cai, a job in Qatar, both my parents took special pains just to talk them out of it.
Then there were bills to pay past the deadline, I didn’t know that this week had a minus-two holidays which I had to pay penalty later on. Then our house help kept reminding me everyday I had to buy a phone replacing the lost one.
While he had sweetly tinker his new touch phone bragging it in front of me, I really can’t live without a phone. There’s just so much correspondence to catch up on.
Then there’s budgeting. There’s not enough money to go around with even if you think you have heaps of them. They just flow like water in and out of your hands. I need to stop buying unnecessary stuff so I could commission one-time wear gowns, shoes and bags to go with it. Manila will be just as expensive meeting up with friends while I’m there. I keep reminding myself to go slow on this. I get panic attacks if I think of a million things and not getting anything done. I’ll make things happen and stop canceling out what needs to be done.

re-blogged

I saw this on my sister's blog, thought you might like it as I have grown fondly of it, Chicken-Soup-for-the-Soul style...

Once there was a blind man who always stays in front of the church. He stayed there and begged everyday of his life. He had a hat placed in front and had a sign beside him that says, "I AM BLIND, PLEASE HELP ME."
One day, a man passed by and noticed the blind man's plight. He changed the sign that was beside the blind man and threw in some coins, then left.
After a while, the kind man wondered how the blind man was doing. He decided to return to where the blind man was. He noticed that the hat was filled to the brim.
Noticing the familiar steps of the kind man, the blind man asked, "Excuse me sir, were you the one who changed my sign a while ago?". "May I know what you wrote?"
"You want to know what I wrote? It says, IT IS A BEAUTIFUL WORLD, & I CAN'T SEE IT."

what Sundays bring

GROWING UP, I NEVER LIKED SUNDAYS, because it was a start of a gruesome study week on early busy mondays and sometimes the feeling makes me throw up or just the thought of it makes me sick. I keep forgetting what it was for. Families, of course.
After Sunday mass, all six of us wouldhead to Giorgio's for pizzas then head to Lola's house for a grand lunch of bulalo, inihaw na liempo,kare-kare and some Pangasinanse dishes that I'm still unfamiliar with to this day. After lunch, the uncles and aunts would gather in a bench to catch up with stories of their own. We'd play tag for a couple of hours or board games til 6 pm and we would be so sleepy that we'd wake up finding ourselves carried by Daddy from the car to our beds.
Ever since I work night shifts during the weekdays, that was the only time I appreciate Sundays. If you noticed this is the only day that seems to drag by lazily and it allows you to take all the time you want.
I love how God balances everything in our lives. To some of us, we do not realize it til we reach a certain age. To most, a thankful prayer that this day had come for rest and getting to touch our centers which are family, friends and self.
I will make everyday Sunday, to never forget that this isn't about work all the time, but the importance that life teaches us to be a family to one another...

i heart Saturdays

IT'S ALWAYS THE BEST day for everybody to unwind,do their own stuff,and getting in touch with their centers.

Growing up, my Saturdays were filled with household chores in the early morning , then a little snack to reward us with a job well done. Our tiny little heads would crowd the big,round mahogany table as we tiptoed excitedly as Mama handed out our ice cream cones. After finishing up with seconds and even third helpings, we'd run by the farm and catch dragonflies, climb trees and play hide-and-seek til one of us would get hurt or if the househelp would call out to lunch.

Those memories amuse me to this very day. My saturdays now are filled with quiet mornings, tinkering on my laptop with soft music, good food to cook, some errands to finish then hang out and have coffee with friends.

Gone are the days when I'd come home drunk and sleep til Sunday night just to crawl back to bed and waste it through Monday afternoons. It's a waste really. But when you grow up, you realize life is so short.You just want to spend it with people you care for, make memories with them and look back at those kinds of things as time goes...

fixing what's broke

I HAD A LITTLE Carousel toy that my brother broke when we were kids. It was brand new and I only played it once or twice when I took it out of the pretty little orange package. When something distracted me for a minute there, my brother instantly took it out of my little hands and tripped while he was running away from me. The little Carousel broke and its little winding button at the back didn't budge when I forced it to function. Instead of crying, I took out a screwdriver and unscrew the nails and broke it down to pieces further. After much deliberation and amazement from my mother, I had the toy run again but not as efficient as before.

That memory re-surfaced again when a good friend of mine had finally decided to talk to me, we have said our apologies and are trying to mend the pieces in the process. It will be a long haul, but we have a lifetime to mend it. For friendships that are worth keeping such as this, the effort of saving will be a work-in-progress. I meant to keep her in my life simply because she is part of who I am today and the memories of the past are worth remembering. Even the painful ones are worth keeping and etched as beautiful, the way they're supposed to be. i agree with some people who says that keeping a list of friends isn't a numbers game. They will be the ones who will stay and tell you what you need to know instead of gossiping your flaws to the world. There are just so many things to keep track of. And a life that is deemed too short for all of us needs nothing short of a miracle.

my random thoughts..post-hibernation

Wow! Has it been that long that I was in hibernation mode? After endless packets of green tea, breakfast salads and loving the colorless liquid we all like calling water, I see dramatic changes in my goal and I'm loving it! The downside of it is that my body can keep a 48-hour cycle without rest, like it always wants to stay active and when my body goes downtime, it can only take 4 hours of sleep and then I'm that energizer bunny again.
And just when I'm about to wave the white flag to being sick, the longtime-planned trip of Cher to Baguio will happen this weeked. How will I call it off when she's rode the bus already? Maybe I should be a good friend and pick her up at the terminal tonight then pop a couple of aspirins on our way to the bar.
My friend Tina has posted a shoutout on her wall just to find me, I think it's embarrassing (chuckle,chuckle) to put out a search party for me like that
I feel that I'm not doing enough to make what I want, work. I guess I just have to keep trying. I wish Ben was here. It feels empty not having him around. Sometimes, I just want to call him so that hearing his voice will make me feel okay. But I don't need him to make me feel okay, I need to be secure about myself and the day I had let him go was the day I knew I was on my own. Whoah! Psh! Drama! I'll just push that thought at the back of my head and keep singing Miley Cyrus's song The Climb.
But you know, I tell myself this: it's okay to fail, it's okay to think of things and people we need but eventually, we just need ourselves to pull through at the end of the day.

chillin'

I JUST FINISHED watching the season finale of Gossip Girl, sigh! Chuck and Blair at last! I was so engrossed in watching the full episode that I had to press back a million times to make sure I didn't miss important plots and lines in the story. Still a lot fo cliffhangers for the next season but the finale was worth it.
Anyhoo, I am hoping to get a few things aligned for the next few months, can't say here what it is, but very important, nonetheless. I have decided to make it my baby project before others take over or grab the chance. To say the least, it's mine! Hahahah. This is just a quick one for now. I don't like hanging out in cyberspace on most of my free time. Time to log off and catch up on sleep, rest and everything in between.

29 cheap thrills

I'm happy with little things that I seemed so programmed with all my life. Simple, simple things that I consider, that perhaps to some, a luxury. Let me just start so you'd have an idea...


1. Burts' Bees Colony Collapse Disorder Lipbalm classic - I don't like lipbalm growing up, because of the greasy petroleum jelly-like smell and feel on the lips. Like any normal experimenting girl, I'd track on Chapsticks and Carmex because everybody was using lip balm and I wanted to see what the fuss was all about, but I wasn't crazy about these two products when I met Burts' Bees. I had the perfect excuse using it because I was always in and out of air-conditioned places and I get cold sores. The best thing about it is, the peppermint tickle my lips way longer than I would expect! When I wake up in the morning, it does wonders on making the lips so soft! I made my friends try it and they've been loyal to it eversince.

2. Johnson's Baby Oil in Aloe Vera - every after bath I use this to get the moisture locked in my skin and to soothe tired muscles after a long tiring day at work. Body lotion just wouldn't do for me. Oil also doubles as a lasting stretch to my cologne. I would pat this behind my ears, wrists, at my nape and collarbones and layer it with cologne and presto! It lasts the whole day because of the concentration of oil and alcohol.

3.Rayon - my pillowcases and bedsheets are made of this fabric. Cheap fabric actually. What I love about it, is its smooth, almost slippery surface that makes me fall asleep, my hands and feet are always happy.

4.Dinners-out, Lunch-Out with friends or family - I consider eating out a luxury because of the time my friends or family and me put in on the weekends or a spontaneous weekday. I'm a big believer of get-togethers and the most important conversations are shared around food.

5. my shoebox - yes, it's real,lol! It's not only something virtual. Whenever we move houses, this is the first thing I rescue from getting lost. I have a shoebox full of memories of friends, ex-boyfriends, jewelries, tickets, keys, snippets, notes, trinkets, and doodles. I open this once in a while, when nostalgia seems to hit big. It reminds me where I came from and what I did to deserve such beautiful words and valuable things. I don't plan to scrapbook it since it would be easy access to people who will accidentally stumble on it. The only shoebox I'd share to the world are my blogs, and that's how public I can get.

6. Beach - every chance I get, this is the place I love running and escaping to. The best relaxation for the mind. It calms and invigorates my nerves and kill stress.

7. my playlists - during work, travels or when I have to catch up with doing a few stuff, music needs to surround me to keep me in the mood

8. FB and Twitter - I get excited when there is so much mail to read that friends from long ago have somehow find their way to find me! My social calendar has never been full!

9. Flavors - vanilla, coconut, butter, raw sugar, caramel, cheese, custard, soy milk, pomegranates, almond are my basic flavors of sweets, funny that I never developed a liking for chocolate, but these flavors give me a natural high

10. Comfort Food - hard-boiled eggs in sauteed tomatoes and onion sauce, turbo roasted ginger soy chicken, bicho-bicho, sapin-sapin, basasong and bangus are my ultimate comfort food. These foods are staple when we were growing up. Nothing beats the a good childhood memory eating these.

11. DEC - Sundays are filled with these. My favorite Chinese Deli in San Juan is my eyecandy for a lazy Sunday morning with Carmela and Kuya Sid. My basket full of Chicken pies, soymilk, taro, maki, squidballs, hakaw, chili sauce and meatballs makes a good foodtrip.

12.MakeUp - I've developed a fascination with color palettes, mascara and lipstick since I was 5 years old. I would sneak in my mom's room and put makeup all over my face and pretend I'm an actress. Fast forward today, I go out wearing my cream blush and lip tint on an ordinary day. But if I have to dress to the nines, I know my makeup geography exceptionally well. They always ask me what salon I go to. lol!

13.Don Henrico's in Session Road - nothing beats an original. Their interiors changed a little. But I wouldn't have it in any of their franchises in Manila because the food here stays the same. Their chicken schnitzel and hand-cut fries are my weaknesses and their tiramisu block is an absolute handsdown!

14. my favorite websites - philippine entertainment portal, sephora, eonline, spot, and gossip girl are the reasons I slave a few extra hours on the net. They are so addictive to visit!

15. my Red Nike Mary Janes - they're like sporty ballet flats and in cherry red! It emphasizes how white and smooth my feet are. This is my favorite pair because during weekdays, I always find myself waling and walking to meetings in heels and wedge pumps, they just relax my tootsies from the harsh elevation of standing all the time for nearly nine hours.

16. Lacoste sports bag in Pearl Grey - my bestfriend hand carried this from London that's why the sentimental value is like a million pesos to me. Always handy and they match perfectly well when I wanna feel classy when doing outdoors-y stuff.

17. Suzie red piggy bank - I bought this at Humor Post and I just fell in love when the little pig had heart-shaped polka dots all over its body with a slit on its back,since I find it a hassle to bring lots of coins. I feed Suzie so she's get full.

18. Bvlgari's Petit et Mamans, Polo Woman by Ralph Lauren, Clean Fresh Laundry, Baby Girl, Victoria's Secret Pink, Woman by Paul Smith, Clinique's Happy Heart and Liz Claiborne's Curve - I live by these tried and tested scents, my exes, friends know how familiar these scents are and they almost always associate it with me.If I had a favorite it would include all of them.

19. Monthly Specials - my loot of magazines are a heap. From YES!, OK, Yummy, Food, Preview, Mega and Candy, I read articles about food, makeup and fashion.

20. Dove - I think I've used up all their selections but my most favorite would definitely be the Dove bar in Olive oil, smells delightful and does all the work for my skin without me having to worry about a single thing.

21. Food Reviews - I base my food finds on food reviews and I find joy that people get to try and share what they think of the food. As much as possible, I don't like repeating the same restos unless it's really worth going back to, I feel there's so much that my palate has to try.

22. Taho - my love affair with soy milk started with Taho. I just loved it so much I would wake up at 5 am everyday during highschool just to wait for Mamang Taho to pass by.

23. Lush, Milk bar soaps - When I take long baths, I use at least 5-8 soaps. Lush was an obvious hangout to go, the scents of different soaps were just too hard to resist. It's so rich and luxurious. I love peppermint, and butter soymilk soaps. HUMAN also offers milk soaps and I like their version of Almond Soap,so I good I love to eat it, lol!

24. Abonn Milk Bath Salt - I placed the milk salt in a jar unlabeled and kept it inside my drawer, my male co-works rummaged through it and took a spoonful and chewed it regretfully. Hahaha. Anyway, the milk salts are that good to smell. Perfect for exfoliating.

25. iPod - I just need pocket music everywhere!

26. Pill kit - my need of my daily medication is so important and I didn't want to keep peeling medicines from its wrapper, so handy

27. Bench Hand Sanitizer in Kiwi - I unconsciously hold on to railings, pull out money, taxi doors and hold Theo. So I need a pocket size germ killer that makes my hands feel fresh and clean when water's not available.

28. Lock n' Lock - my perfect baon companion for soup lunches and sauces. spill-proof!

29. Rosary - prayer is so important. And my Rosary is my weapon when I feel down and out, or happy and thankful

indoors

The rainy weekend brought almost everybody to be curling up in their warm and cozy houses instead of trekking the malls and walk-throughs in the park. My dad still sulk over the fact that he didn't get his money's worth on the Pacquiao-Hatton fight, there was so much laughing in my head.
I did my share by making sure the four-hour sleep didn't get to me and got dressed, excited to see my nephew Theo. I was wanting to try a bottle of cologne my mom stashed away and I was crushing on for a long time. But Theo was used to my Paul Smith perfume that he hugged me tight everytime he took a chance whiffing at my neck. His tiny little hands cupped my face and was cooing as if he wanted to say something affectionate. He is my slice of heaven..I got some toasted siopao delivered and torn strips of the soft bread and he happily chewed it, excitedly anticipating the next bite.
A few hours of playing with him, I head off to meet some of my friends, Waynie and Rey having dinner at Don Henrico's, we had good conversation over chicken schnitzel, spaghetti,spuds, pizza, iced tea and our favorite Tiramisu.
As much as I had to shy away from cyberspace, I had some few things to download and upload, plus talk to my sister Chris on Skype. I'm getting behind correspondence,too. Blame it on the rain for making me so lazy to just get up and get on with the program. I can't wait for Gossip Girl to have their season finale so I could do the complete DVD Marathon. I am totally in love iwth the Blair-Chuck chase it's killing me! What's next on my list that I wanna do indoors? Cluedo?Taboo? Parcheesi? Oh yeah, cooking is so much fun and Theo will be my very own critique. I gotta start banging the pots and pans for the rainy months!

pitter-patter, drip, drip, splash!

WHILE MANILA BASKS in the sweltering heat of the sun, Baguio shows no sign of heat with the cold, rainy afternoons and evenings to stay. Almost all members of my family are coming down with the flu and our help had been kind enough to prepare different kinds of soups for lunch and dinner meals. Of course the occassional iced fruits for desserts (I couldn't get enough of the buttery sweetness of avocados!). The roads and pavements have been slippery for days now and the fog gets thick as days progress. I live 5 minutes away from the city where our home is tucked cozily among pinetrees. Years ago, we lived near the University belt where jeepneys honk loud and we get robbed a lot. Now, my parents appreciate the quiteness of home and the sleepy lullaby that the night wind brings to their bedroom window.. We couldn't really feel the heat of summer since Baguio rains pretty much all year round.
I can't for Sher to visit! Everyday, she always asks how I am and she makes sure to call everyday to know if I'm okay. She's such a wonderful friend to have, I only met her last year and she's very caring and thoughtful when it comes to her friends. I'm glad I'm one of them. We're still planning on when's the best month for her to visit since both our social calendar is full for April and May.
My brother, Woodee went to Clark to train employees at his company and went to Manila to join my sister Car and brother Sid for dinner at the Shang, and they really had a great time. The next day, Woodee came home with a box of my Dad's favorite roasted chicken from Savory and it made my mom and dad's breakfast more enjoyable that day. I had my own cravings to deal on this particular rainy day which were my Twilight series books (nesting comfortably in my bookshelf in Manila), a John Lloyd-Sarah movie rerun, playing with my neffy Theo, watching Jon and Kate plus eight, Gossip Girl reruns, listening to the Circus album of Eraserheads and chocolate cinnamon with cream cheese frosting from Cinnabon.
Oh by the way, there was this one disturbing site that I came across and it showed how the most delicious food can be at its monter-sized, sinful and nightmarish look. I go to the site and food doesn't make me hungry anymore. It's appropriately called, "This is why you're fat". Gosh, at times, there are just some sites that I regret going across to. It's one of the many reasons I'd rather deal with the good old hardbounds, paperbacks, and TV. But it looks like the rainy days will be here for awhile and you do all you can so you won't get bored...

over Iced Peaches and Mangoes...

WEEKENDS MEANT FAMILY bonding. I have been busy the whole week running errands, tests and coming home every night at 9pm to reheated dinners while my parents announce they would call it a night. I spent the early afternoon watching Animal Planet with my mom and the rest of my day checking old videos from family European travels and Theo's very own video movie. My parents will be visiting my sister Christine in San Diego then cruise with my aunts and uncles in Vancouver so it was important that I archive everything and have it burned on DVD copies for their alis-bayan box.
It will be a really big weekend on July 18th as we celebrate Theo's, Carmela's and Daddy's birthdays, since my parents will be leaving on the 20th of that month for their annual out-of-the-country trip. The problem is, I have a surprise party for someone on the 18th and organized a reunion of friends on July 19th in Manila! I guess I have to think about my plans thoroughly.
I opened a Twitter account and I'm still deciding if I like it or not. Facebook's been going downhill for me after the interface early this year and I stopped threading my blogs from blogspot to my Multiply account for my semi-public audience plus I've been a nine-hour computer user since February, it would really do me good if I talk to people personally instead, so I'm cutting back on my hours and doing at least 30 minutes of online checking on an everyday basis or just stay away from it for a day or two.
I watched my mom as she spooned syrup on her bowl of peaches and mangoes, she talked in a low,soft tone as she cleared her throat, she shivered slightly when she informed me that she was coming down with a fever. I listened to her stories as she dozed off to sleep. I made sure the househelp prepared her late lunch of sinigang na salmon when she woke up. The weather was unforgiving since Friday, it rained hard and the cold was like sharp needles piercing through our skins, I heard Manila was a scorcher and I wish I could share the weather down there. I cuddled beside mama, and hugged her close to me. Hmmm.. this is so comforting than a cup of hot cocoa...

happy kind of tired

I HAD NO CHOICE but to go to Manila and accomplish a few things in which my mom shook her head in disappointment and reminded me that postponing things will just heavy the burden, why oh why did I put it aside?
My brother-in-law H, called me the night before to remind me that he was picking me up at four in the morning. I grumbled heavily as I took a little baby luggage out of my dresser and packed my essentials. In my PJs, I had to say goodbye to Tina online as I prepared a few things before the lazy 6-hour ride to Manila. I made a mental note to remind yaya to find my sunblock when she woke up before I leave.

6am, Tarlac

My eyes peered painfully down the dusty road, the sun wasn't kind as it began to scorch through our skins on the reflective glass. H had to run a few errands down Camp Aquino and the Akon CD started to get to my nerves as it started its third round on the player. Good thing Jerve, H's brother, switched to an Eraserheads CD when he noticed Akon burning our ears. We were headed out to the expressway soon and we were taking our breakfast down there.


11 am, my Apartment
Jerve carried my luggage at the staircase and I took it gladly as he waved goodbye. I looked around the apartment, my brother Sid and my sister Car were at work. I plopped down my unmade bed as I decided to run my errands at 1pm, my head wobbled a bit, I wanted to get some sleep but I reminded myself that I can't delay things anymore and needed it to be done right away besides, I deserved this torture.


3pm, Pasay
I tapped my fingers impatiently as the traffic went from bad to worse. The sun bakes painfully,too! MOA was filled with people taking strolls with a cold drink in their hands. I was parched, but I needed to find an office squeezed between buildings. As soon as I was done with my errand, rush hour was about to begin, so I hurriedly searched for a taxi lane as I desperately swallowed hard to fight my urge to get a curry puff at Old Chang Kee. It was a choice I was making, the sky looked gloomy and I think hard rain was going to fall any minute, so I bade goodbye to my food craving and hailed a very old cab that was waiting for me on the line. I hope the cab gets to Kyusi in one piece.

8pm, the Grill

Grr..Sher! I was waiting for two hours at our watering hole to get a good decent meal and already my energy is beginning to shut down. She came hurriedly and ordered two bottles of beer for her while I fought my weariness throughout my chicken barbecue dinner. Part of me wanted to go home and hide between the covers of my bed but a part of me encouraged me to eat so I could take my medicine. I couldn't remember how Sher dropped me off at my apartment that night because I was sooo tired, what a day!



Saturday

My sister Car had a couple of pizzas and pasta delivered at home. We were just in front of the TV enjoying a beef shawarma pizza and hanging out. We planned to spend the day together, but H called and said we had to leave by 2 pm, bummer! Our plans were cut short as I packed some last minute stuff and waited for H to pick me up. We left Kyusi with boxes of Krispy Kremes and pastries from Breadtalk. It was interesting for me, H and Jerve to have six hours together. We stopped at a few pitstops to buy food, rest a bit and we finally settled at Isdaan in Gerona Tarlac for some major pinoy comfort food fix. The big fish that was a facade of the restaurant gave us an exciting welcome. As we entered the restaurant, several nipa huts afloat the wide river with japanese kois swimming happily underneath it. The staff were dressed in traditional baro and saya, a few musikeros were behind them as they waited for us to be seated. I looked around really excited with my surroundings as bright candles lit up the pathways of bamboo and straws, I looked at the water and the kois were jumping, causing to splash water on us a little bit. Our orders came buko juice, chicken, sinigang na baboy, and pla-pla, while we savored th food and its ambience, lights went off to support Earth Hour, so, although, I couldn't see what I was eating, candles were everywhere to light up the entire restaurant. And the harana was at its most beautiful tune tempting everyone to sing along. I will come back to Manila, tiring trip or not.

hello, Manila!

I'M PACKING A FEW STUFF to bring to Manila. Me and Sher made arrangements that she would pick me up this Thursday morning. We'll be heading out to St. Luke's for some medicine-shopping, go to the mall and have dinner. I miss Manila despite its scorching weather, some rude cab drivers, and the busy people. I'll be there to visit a few friends, and get some stuff since I'm settling in Baguio while I'm in a rehab program. So excited to see my friends..Charles, Sher and Tina! My brother-in-law, along with his brothers will be bringing the van, so I don't get to worry about the bus anymore. Tina will be making me her version of leche flan, Kapampangan style using duck eggs filtered in katsa and Sher will just get me drunk after dinner for a mini-"welcome,biatch!" party.
My mom allowed me to go just this one time because I begged her for a couple of weeks. So armed with my medicine case, a few clothes, and a little packed strength, I will enjoy the city for all it's worth :)