June in December...

Two days before Christmas, I busily packed my things at the office, and hurriedly stuffed my big paper bag with gifts my agents gave me. I checked my watch and my bus was scheduled to leave three hours from now. I will be spending a week-long Christmas vacation in Baguio.

As I began to log off my computer, one of my co-workers V approached me and said: "June died.." her voice trailed off. Instantly, my world fell apart, I sat there for hours contacting friends telling the news that he have been on a motorbike accident that early morning and he did not survive the crash, I stared at the carpet shaking. I remembered June inviting me the day before with his teammates on a drinking spree but I declined the offer because I was needed someplace.

June was always the agent who came in late, often giving me an apologetic look as he logs in for calls. He was always sweet like a little brother asking me anything specially about his job. He would make me laugh and he'd always get my little stuffed toy off my computer so that he could play with it.

I called my mom telling her that I couldn't make it for Christmas. I mourned deeply for June's loss and I was depressed for days. It was the worst Christmas I had spending it with a block of ham and looking at the colorful parols hanging on the outside the streets in Manila.

After a few days, I went to his wake and June's mother held my hand tight as tears streamed down her face. June had that impact on me. He gave me strength and meaning to my leadership and I treated him as a friend. My team was my second family and looking after them was my pride and joy.

I have learned to grieve for a loved one in the worst way I know. I forgot how it was to exist in this world and that days would not stop if I had let my own life to rot. Slowly, I noticed that the sun seemed brighter than the usual and I started coming out of my shell, I will always love my June and I know he would have been happier if I let his memory go and enjoy life everyday. After his death, I came to know the good in everybody, that no matter how bad they can be, there is that genuine part of them that they will share to their closest circles. I learned that everyday is different than the rest and what I have done will be part of what I have become - I may not be able to go back to the past, but I still have a chance to make up for it. Chances are endless and treat one as if it is your last. That's why I am here - to make a difference.

Thank you, June. For coming to my life and for making it matter. You gave me reason to think that there is so much love to give as I have for you...