Kuya

I get excited to see family members who I've missed and have not seen personally for months! Mine was my brother Sid who came home from the holidays. Since my parents were drained out from running errands or what the day demanded, they retired early for bed and opted to just laze around the house. My brother W was hard to get out of the house as he just stays in bed, surfing the net and brains out his PSP.

We watched Shake, Rattle and Roll XI. He watched gamely with me since he knew I was fond of Ruffa Guiterrez lately. He kept laughing at the horror scenes while we pig out on waffles and barbecue-flavored fries. Then we headed to Kubo Grill in Legarda for dinner and dined in on Liempo, Barbecue and Bulalo, finishing off the night with French Vanilla coffees. I missed his opinions in life, his being persistent and who I would always remember as the most thoughtful person in our circle. He never failed to save my butt in my troubles and he taught me how to be as optimistic as I could ever be. Now his dream to be in Dubai this year is soon to unravel. I will miss him so. And the thought gets me teary-eyed. As I finished the last sip of my coffee I peeked into his room, he slowly hummed some old-school song while packing, he looked at me and made a funny face. I returned back my funny face too, thinking this was one of our own precious moments of the many we will have as we grow old..

why INDIFFERENCE is such a big word to some.

Anong petsa na?!! That's the expression I would often hear from a lot of people nowadays when some would procrastinate on things. Life - as busy as it gets - got in the way of certain things. I miss blogging for one. Family time have been an absolute blessing for a few weeks straight and of course the surprises I get from financial gains year-end.
The holidays are always a time for realization and wake-up calls. Mine is a big slap in the face, in the recurring episodes of my male best friend of six years. He got really mad (in his words: "more of pissed") for me not attending our best friend's wedding. Ben was there, excited and all to see me walking down in the aisle as part of the entourage, but when he saw not even a shadow of me, he got alarmingly worried and texted something like: "help me understand why you're not here". The drama ends where he saw my wall posts partying hard here in Baguio when I could have been at the wedding partying with him. We made pre-plans of having dinner, talking and going out after but it never materialized.
After a year and a half of not seeing each other, he just stopped. Stoppped being patient and being apologetic of the little things he do if I get short-fused on him. He felt he had to step on the gas somewhat and not really caring what I would think even if I got hurt in the process. We tried to patch things up but his was a harsh reminder of what could have been when we saw each other. Four months from now, the reunion of good friends from a former company will conceptualize and I'm just as excited. But seeing Ben? We were once fond and affectionate of each other's friendship that I doubt if he would make it just because I stood up on him one too many times. He makes it feel all these efforts are not enough. But I dont want to try my luck on the cards table again. The risk is bigger this time. I'm not willing to make apiece of it. Unresolved. Back and forth. Egos got in the way. Indifference..
This issue I am willing to procrastinate on.