scatter-brained.

MY MIND IS RUNNING ALL OVER THE PLACE TODAY. Of all the days that I had to wake up with worry, it had to be Monday! I still couldn’t get over it. I dreamed that I was so big and I had to fit into a size 4 dress in a week for my best friend’s wedding. It can be a shallow of a dream, but it felt so excruciatingly depressing several hours after I woke up. I’m just so pressed with a November 30 wedding date on top of my head. I’ve been writing in dawdles all over my organizer. And I’m so upset with myself that I have cancelled out appointments because I lagged too much. Silly me.
Secondly, I was talking to my mom and she wanted me to go to Canada to work when my heart is set on Bahrain. She personally didn’t like Gulf countries, W was offered a job in Saudi and Cai, a job in Qatar, both my parents took special pains just to talk them out of it.
Then there were bills to pay past the deadline, I didn’t know that this week had a minus-two holidays which I had to pay penalty later on. Then our house help kept reminding me everyday I had to buy a phone replacing the lost one.
While he had sweetly tinker his new touch phone bragging it in front of me, I really can’t live without a phone. There’s just so much correspondence to catch up on.
Then there’s budgeting. There’s not enough money to go around with even if you think you have heaps of them. They just flow like water in and out of your hands. I need to stop buying unnecessary stuff so I could commission one-time wear gowns, shoes and bags to go with it. Manila will be just as expensive meeting up with friends while I’m there. I keep reminding myself to go slow on this. I get panic attacks if I think of a million things and not getting anything done. I’ll make things happen and stop canceling out what needs to be done.