my sweetest chapters

My sweetest chapters
In my life, I look back at certain chapters where I am at my happiest. When I remember these things, I feel that, at one time in my life, I've been the star of my own show..

Chapter 1 - meeting R
R was a cadet, I met him one sunny morning in Camp John Hay where cadets and foster families get together for a Sunday picnic. He was peeling a banana and I giggled. R smiled at me and we started to talk. He didn't know who I was with and we didn't exchange numbers at that time because my family and I had to leave immediately.

There was a ball at the Convention Center the week after that, and from where I was sitting, I could see him trying to find me. After everybody had gone home, he took my hand and we talked for a bit. He looked at me and we knew this was gonna last. He sent me flowers on Valentines day, 10 days after we met, and he said that he liked me. Months after pursuing me, I decided to take a chance at love and said "Yes" on..

Chapter 2: My Eighteenth Birthday
Everybody who I knew was there. My mom and dad knew this was the gift I wanted, to have all my friends gather in one place and savor the moment that it was my day and to celebrate my existence. I looked at R at the end of the room and he was anxious to see what this day will turn out to be for the both of us. As a cadet, he had a serial number, R knew that his serial number coincides with the date I said yes to being a couple. He hugged me so tight and never wanted to let me go, the feeling was amazing on loving someone and being loved.

Chapter 3: "She's pregnant.."
I pulled my hand away when he said those words quietly. After years of having him, it was time to let go, I know there were bigger things meant for me, and R was not part of it anymore. It became clear to me, that I can cry inspite of the happiness I thought my life laid out for me. I started to learn that this chapter was just one of the many trials I had to go through and it shook my relationship with the Lord. There was a point in my life where he couldn't let go even if I shut the door in his face. He realized in the end that I was the one who he wished he had fought for all these years. But I realize that there is no one in my life who is constant except my faith in God.

Chapter 4: My promotion
I deserved to be here. To be at the level where I have worked so hard for. My co-workers have been so happy for me and taking the stage to acknowledge me in a higher position with the most defeaning roar of claps made my achievement even more victorious.

Chapter 5: When I met Ben
This is my most favorite chapter of all. I will not share all the details in this as I'm still going through alot with him as of this writing. But this I will write...We were enemies at the office then we started being friends and we have evolved to be the best of friends.I came to learn to let go and give him wings to fly. I know he's happy with all the things he is blessed with. I just finally decided I did not want to be part of the world he choose to dream in. For I had my own world to think about and in mine, I have yet to find my happy ending.

Although the "me" part was not that established yet, I am hopeful that my decisions will prove to be promising in the next days and even for the rest of my life. I know there will be more chapters in my life that I can truly pick up the pieces and learn from and I also know I have a strong support system to pull me gently to the ground once I try to fly away and escape from everything else. In my life, I am the lead actor and I tell the actors their cue. I have grown so much to realize that the time has come to continue the process of moving up and moving forward. And that time is now...